What I've Become and Who I Am
by ForgetMeNevermore
Summary: Dark Jackie fic with a lot of JH and some JK, my first 70's fic, please rr and thank you all for your sweet reviews, they mean so much to me :) There's now a Sequel: The Turning of the World.
1. Back to the Beginning

I looked in the mirror. I never liked what I saw. Bet that would surprise a lot of people in my life. Half the time I just thought I was crazy, acting all perfect and hyped. Look at me. They have to know I'm a mess. But maybe they don't know me, maybe they can't see me. Even Hyde, who's been the best guy I've ever been with. Donna, my best friend, doesn't know me. How did I even get so lucky to meet people like them?  
  
Jackie took a step back from the mirror, lowering the razor blade away from her face. She was too vain to do something as damaging as cutting up her face, besides, what good would it do her?  
  
"JACKIE! OPEN UP THE GODDAMN DOOR NOW!" Hyde screamed, more pleadingly then angrily, as he rammed his body at the door from the other side. The door was practically shaking off of it's hinges with each strike.  
  
Jackie turned abruptly. She had completely tuned out the sounds from the other side until now. She was almost confused, how did she end up here?  
  
Looking down at the razor in her hand, she remembered. She turned to look at herself in the mirror one last time. "I hate you," she said in a hoarse tone, as she glared at her own reflection staring back at her. Raising the razor up to her wrist, she closed her eyes tightly, and sliced the sharp, cool tip into her skin and to her veins, listening to the sounds of Hyde crashing through the bathroom door.  
  
THREE WEEKS AGO  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
I really don't remember when things changed for me, isn't that awful? I feel pretty okay about everything, I mean I'm a senior now, I'm practically engaged smiles and my mom is back. Oh, and I'm pretty and popular, so I really think I'm getting Most Adored in this year's yearbook. The other cheerleaders promised to vote for me. But here's the problem, Donna's dad found my diet pills today! He seemed really worried, which I guess is kind of cute, even for him, but he showed my mom! How dare he! I just told her they weren't mine, that I was holding them for a friend. Mom seems to understand. But then again, I'm sure she does.  
  
Love,  
  
Jackie  
  
"Jackie I need to talk to you," came Donna's voice from behind her. Jackie, who had been laying on her stomach writing in her diary on her bed, turned to look at Donna in the doorway.   
  
"Yeah, what is it?" she asked, sitting up on her legs as she looked at Donna.   
  
"Where's those pills my dad found today?" she demanded to know, crossing her arms over her chest as her eyes burled into Jackie's.  
  
Jackie looked up at her with the most offended look on her face, her mouth dropping open in astonishment as she raised to Donna's level, standing up from the bed. "That's none of your business, Donna! And that's none of his!" she spat out, much to Donna's surprise. She turned to leave the room after that, not really feeling the need to justify herself or her actions. She had been taking them since she was 12, who was Donna or anyone else to say she couldn't, or that it was wrong? She had been fine up until now. She was healthy and thin and everyone liked her. Who was Donna to butt into things, or her nosey father?  
  
Donna stormed after Jackie though, grabbing her by the arm and making her turn around. "So are the laxatives in the bathroom your's too, or do I even have to ask?" she continued to question, her voice even more overbearing than before.   
  
Jackie just glared at her. She couldn't believe how ridiculous this was getting. "So you're going through my personal things now? Donna! That was in my damn make-up bag, of course you know it's mine," she snapped at her, a vicious, cold look forming in her eyes as she shook her arm free of Donna's grasp. "You stay out of my damn things Donna, I mean it." Without another word Jackie ran off down the steps, taking off. 


	2. Confrontation

Dear Diary,  
  
Well, it looks like Donna not only raided through my things, but she took them as well. I haven't had any pills in two days, and I haven't spoken to her or the gang in that long either. I knew she ran her big mouth and told them everything. Steven's called at least 10 times, I'll have to start keeping count and giving him a point for each call he does attempt to make. At least that way I'll know he still cares. I just hope he doesn't do something stupid like break up with me over this. But that's ridiculous, God, he smokes pot! Who is he to lecture me? I think I'm the best behaved out of the group, but it's still not right of Donna to go and blab like some girl scout.  
  
Love,   
  
Jackie  
  
Closing her softly colored pink diary, with stickers of unicorms and hearts placed randomly all along the cover, Jackie looked up as she sat along the front row of the bleechers, looking out across the field as the squad practiced their cheers. She shoved her journal protectively under her jacket and went over to join them, but was cut short before she even took two steps.  
  
Who was to walk in front of her none other than Hyde, much to her surprise. "What are you doing here?" she asked with a puzzeled look on her face, keeping her voice low-toned so that the other girls wouldn't hear them.   
  
He stared down at her, his darkened sun glasses hiding his eyes, as they usually did. But this time, he surprised her by taking them off and looking her in the eye, out in public. "Donna told me what's been going on," he said, but she couldn't place yet whether he was angry or worried. His eyes looked into her's deeply, as if he was searching for answers, trying to help her.  
  
Jackie didn't answer. She didn't need this right now. She felt crowded and ganged up on, but most importantly, she felt betrayed by Donna. Anger rushing through ever fiber of her body, she turned her back on Hyde, walking away and shaking her head. Hyde impusively reached out and grabbed her arm. "Jackie, stop," he said in a gruff tone, but Jackie spun around and shoved him away from her, freeing her arm and taking off for the parking lot on a dead run. She felt like some escapee, fleeing from the police before something worse happened. They had already found out her secret though, and to be honest, she wasn't sure what she was going to do once she ran, she knew she just wanted out of there.  
  
Hyde was only one step behind her the whole way, chasing after her and making one last grab for her arm to stop her. But Jackie only smacked him away, running faster as tears flooded down her face. She hadn't expected Hyde to keep coming though, and let out a scream as she felt him come up from behind her, embracing his arms around her body as he lifted her up off her feet and pulled her back. Jackie was too stunned to do anything but yell as Hyde grabbed onto her like that, but she soon began to claw at his hands as she tried to make him put her back down, cursing every name in the book at him.  
  
"Jackie stop it and listen!" he begged her, having never reacted like this before. He was usually so laid back with a "not a care in the world" attitude, but something in him was killing him now. He felt stabbing jolts of pain rip through him as reality hit him. He knew this was worse than he had imagined. His arms around Jackie, he could feel practically nothing there. There was nothing left of her. She barely weighed anything in his arms. The bones in her ribs rubbed against his hands as he held her, and without realizing it, tears started forming in Hyde's eyes. He was her boyfriend, he was with her every day. He should have known.  
  
Jackie kicked him hard in the knee. Hyde yelped out from the pain and lost his grip on Jackie, as she went stumbling to the ground. Not being able to lift herself back up, and completely drained and dizzy by now, Jackie began to crawl away. Hyde sunk to pavement as well, but not before catching up with Jackie. Turning her over, he hovered over her, pinning her arms to the ground as he held himself up over top of her.   
  
His eyes were red and glazed, and she knew he had been crying. But Jackie just turned her head and looked away from him, not even struggling against his hands. "You're coming back to Eric's with me. We told Mrs. Foreman... She said we should go get you checked out, Jackie," he said in a low tone, trying his hardest to keep his voice even as he spoke, but it just came out as a shaken mess.   
  
Jackie didn't answer, she just laid there, feeling nothing but rage fulfill her. She knew what was going to happen. They were going to admit her, but if she could somehow talk her mom out of it, then what? They would be monitering her all the time. She would never get to live the life she was leading now, she would never have her safety net anymore. Everything had changed. Steven and Donna had just ruined her future. 


	3. A Quick Escape

They were all there, gathered in Eric's kitchen, all eyes practically on Jackie as she sat at the table, with Steven beside her and Donna on the other side. Mrs. Foreman was standing across from them, Eric beside her as he awkwardly looked away, not sure if he should even say anything or be there. It seemed too personal, and he wasn't as close to Jackie as the others.  
  
Just then Jackie's mom came through the back door. "I came as soon as I could," she said to Kitty as her eyes met with Jackie's.   
  
"That was a half hour ago, you live beside us," Kitty told her, raising an eyebrow in question at her.   
  
"Jackie, you are in so much trouble young lady, come on, let's go home," she said, choosing to ignore Kitty as she waved Jackie to follow her. Jackie more than gladly got up from the table, moving past Hyde and Donna to go over towards her mom. "Thank you for telling me everything Kitty, I had no idea things were this bad," she said densely, even with all of Donna's accusations in the past few days, she had chose to just block it all out and label it as harmless dieting.  
  
"Wait, you can't just ignore this," Hyde snapped at her, raising up from the table as he walked towards Jackie's mom. "You're just going to let her go home and punish her? She needs help, damnit." His voice was raising more in anger as he looked at Jackie's mom. He couldn't believe she was so careless about her own daughter.  
  
"Mom, I'll be next door," Jackie said quietly to her mom, giving Hyde an angry glare before taking off out the door. Hyde bolted across the kitchen to catch her, but Jackie's mom stepped in his way.   
  
"I will handle this Steven, don't worry. We are going to figure things out tonight," she said, in a rather annoyed tone. She found him to be the most likely to blame, since in her own past she had only known guys who wanted their girlfriends to be pretty and perfect. In her eyes, Hyde was at fault.  
  
Outside, Jackie stopped once she got to the edge of the Foreman's yard. She looked back at the house, almost surprised Steven hadn't followed her this time. Just then she heard the sound of a car pulling up to the side of the road, and turned her head abruptly. It was Michael. He leaned over the passenger's seat and rolled down the window, looking out at Jackie.  
  
"Want a ride?" he asked her, for once in his life not having that stupid unknowing grin on his face. Jackie's frown remained etched on her lips, as she nodded and went towards his car, opening up the door and hopping in.   
  
The car ride remained silent for the first ten minutes. Jackie sat there staring out her side window, as Kelso drove slowly down their suburbian town, until reaching the highway. There was hardly anyone on the road, and at times he would catch himself looking over at Jackie and just staring at her, seeing if she would be the first to try and talk. But he knew it would be up to him.  
  
"You haven't been over at Eric's lately," he said, but with the responsibility of Brooke about to have his child, he probably shouldn't have been over there as much either. A major part of him wasn't ready for all of this, he just wished things could be like they used to.  
  
"Yeah, me and Donna are fighting," Jackie lied, her voice nonchalant and just above a whisper as she spoke. She didn't turn away from her window though, she just kept staring out at the passing trees and guardrail that lined the edge of the road.   
  
Kelso didn't say anything for the longest time. Many thoughts were running through his head, especially about his past with Jackie. "Was it my fault?" he asked, his voice almost cracking as the words escaped his lips.   
  
Jackie finally turned her head, looking over at Kelso with a puzzled look on her face. "No Michael... I started this before I even knew you," she told him softly, a part of her wanting to blame him for the vain relationship that they had together, but another part of her knowing how much she cared about him and that deep down, it was only her fault.  
  
Kelso nodded only to let her know that he had heard her, as he looked back at the road, the car entering into the next suburbian town over. Another long period of silence followed, until Kelso broke it. "I only loved you," he told her, thinking of Brooke then, and how he was afraid that he might never love her as he did Jackie. "I do care about Brooke, a lot, and I love her... But I think I will always be in love with you," he admitted to her, his hands beginning to shake against the steering wheel as he tried to hold onto it steadily. He could feel the tears threatening to fall as he thought about how much his life had changed, and more importantly, what he had lost for good now. There was no chance he would ever be able to have her back, it was over and he knew that.  
  
Jackie jerked her head over to look at him. She was so angry right now. How could he do this to her, at a time like this?! "Pull over," she demanded, crossing her arms over her chest. She felt like she just wanted to crawl in a hole and die. After all he had put her through, he was trying to mess up her life once again. "NOW!" she screamed when Kelso failed to respond, reaching over for herself and grabbing onto the wheel. Kelso quickly stepped on the break, haulting to a stop as Jackie let go of the wheel and flung open her door, taking off as quick as she could.   
  
It took a few minutes before Kelso could regain sense of reality, and got out of the car to go after her, but it was too late. She was nowhere in sight. Hyde was going to kill him... 


	4. The News

Jackie walked back home, which would probably take her a good many hours to do, possibly even a whole day. She didn't care, she couldn't bear to be around Michael anymore. It was warm out, the sun beating down against her and making her cheeks blush a rosey, but sickly shade of red. She was dizzy and thirsty, continuously stopping along the roadside and having to lean against a tree to keep from passing out. She ate enough yesterday to keep her alive, and she was probably eating even more now that all her diet pills and laxatives were gone. How she was feeling now was weird, she had never felt this way before. It was as if her whole body was now turning against her, or giving up. She wondered if this was what withdrawl felt like. Or if this was what dying felt like.  
  
Stopping to rest up against a tree, Jackie felt the sudden impulse to throw up. Kneeling over, she started puking up acids inside her body, barely having any food to come out of her. She gasped for air and grabbed at her stomach, sitting down along the road and trying to catch her breath. She just wanted the pain to end, she'd even eat if that's what it took.  
  
Luckily, a car stopped by to pick her up.  
  
TWO DAYS LATER  
  
"What did the doctor says Jackie?" her mom asked, seating in the waiting room as she lowered the Cosmo magazine in her hands. Jackie flopped down onto the seat beside her and shrugged, pouting as she looked down at her hands. "Jackie, tell me," her mom insisted, a hint of concern in her voice.  
  
Jackie looked over at her mom as she picked up her purse, brushing her hair back off of her shoulders. "He just did a bunch of tests. Took some blood," she answered, pulling out a small slip of paper for her mom. "He prescribed some vitamins and some pills, to help me gain some appetite. That's about it," she said, rising up from her seat and heading out of the doctor's office in front of her mother.   
  
The next couple of days went the same as they had since she had gotten back home. Her phone would ring in the morning, waking her up at about eight or nine. It was Steven, she knew it. It was right before he left for work. Then around mid-afternoon, the phone would ring a few more times. Jackie would debate on who was calling her sometimes. Maybe it wasn't Steven at all, maybe it was Michael. Donna offered her no help on guessing who it was. She did however charge up the steps one time and burst into the room, demanding that Jackie go downstairs and talk to Steven, who was waiting down in the kitchen. Jackie just rolled over in the bed and hid her face under the covers, groaning out words that were too muffled by the covers to make sense.  
  
One call in particular should have been picked up, but it wasn't. Instead, the caller tried Jackie's mother's phone, and got through. Jackie's mom answered, hearing the voice of her daughter's doctor on the other line. She nearly dropped the phone in shock from what she had just heard. Charging up the steps, she barged into Donna and Jackie's room, Donna luckily being away.   
  
"Do you know what your doctor just told me?!" she gasped out, her angry for her daughter raising to an all-time high. Jackie peered up from behind her covers, frowning at her mom in confusion.  
  
"Well, it looks like I'm going to be a grandmother! Do you know how much you've just ruined my life, Jackie! How am I going to get remarried now?" she spat out, speaking the first thoughts that came into her mind. She shook her head and covered her eyes with her hand, feeling like she was about to burst. "Jackie, you need to think hard about this," she said, feeling slightly more reasonable and calm than a few seconds ago. After all, this did effect Jackie more than it did her...  
  
Jackie just sat there, speechless. What was she going to do with a baby? She wasn't even married yet... Steven had no money to help her support a baby... She wasn't even healthy enough to have a baby! It would probably come out with something wrong with it!.... No, she was too young for this to be happening. This had to be some kind of awful nightmare... Never had she wanted to die more than she did right at that moment. Her life was over. 


	5. The Decision

"I thought we were watching a movie?" Jackie asked, seated between Donna and Fez on the couch. Eric was sitting across from them in Hyde's chair, but no one had seen Kelso in days, assuming he was just spending more time at Brooke's. Jackie feared that wasn't the reason, though.  
  
Donna looked at Eric. That's when Jackie knew something was up. Turning back to Jackie, Donna smiled and grabbed the remote control, which was seated between the two girls. "Yeah, in just a minute. It doesn't start for another five minutes," she said, but had said almost the same thing ten minutes ago. Jackie sprang up from the couch, giving Donna a sharp look as she opened her mouth to speak, but just then the back door flew open. It was Steven.  
  
Jackie looked from Steven, and then back to Donna, hurt showing in her eyes as tears threatened to fall. "You told him?" she whispered out, just as Hyde rushed forward and attempted to reach for Jackie. But Jackie backed up, just missing Steven's hand.   
  
"Jackie-" he started to say, his voice tender and comforting, but she could sense something else. Something broken inside his voice, as if he was about to break down into tears, which is something she had never seen Steven do. She knew she had caused enough trouble after everyone found out about her eating habits, but this, this was going to wreck lives. She could see the fear in Steven's eyes, the last spark of hope that this was all a nightmare and that she wasn't really pregnant. That she wasn't going to trap him like he had always feared, and force him into marriage and to become a family. He had only just begun to learn how to act like a compassionate boyfriend, but this would probably send him running. He couldn't handle a baby, or being with her for the rest of his life.   
  
Bolting to the basement bathroom door, she ran inside and locked it shut. Seconds later Hyde was at the door. She could hear him twist and shake the knob, begging for her to open up. When she didn't respond, he started throwing his whole weigh against it, screaming for her to open it, demanding her to. "Jackie! JACKIE! OPEN THIS DOOR!... Jackie... Don't do anything," he tried to scream, but his voice started to break before he could finish. She could hear the tears in his voice, she knew he was crying by now, that he was still begging for her to just open it.   
  
How did he know what she was going to do? How did he know what was going through her mind? However he did it, he was right. Jackie opened Eric's cabinet behind the mirror. Taking out one of his razors, she closed it, looking at her own reflection once she did. She stared at herself for the longest time, and then stared down at the razor, touching the blade with her finger.  
  
"JACKIE! OPEN UP THE GODDAMN DOOR NOW!" Hyde screamed from the other side, the sobs apparent in his voice. The door was practically shaking off of it's hinges with each strike he made against it.  
  
Jackie turned towards the door, but only briefly. Looking back down at the razor in her hand, she knew it was the only way out. She turned to look at herself in the mirror one last time. "I hate you," she said in a hoarse tone, as she glared at her own reflection staring back at her. Raising the razor up to her wrist, she closed her eyes tightly, and sliced the sharp, cool tip into her skin and to her veins, listening to the sounds of Hyde crashing through the bathroom door.  
  
As the door broke open, Hyde fell onto the floor. The first thing he saw was all the blood covering his beautiful girlfriend, as she laid on the floor with a razor clutched between her small fingers. "NO! JACKIE!" he screamed out hysterically, painful cries leaving his mouth as he crawled over to her side and picked her up, holding her in his arms. He craddled her close to his body, stroking the hair out of her face as the tears flooded out of him. "SOMEONE! GET HELP..." he trailed off as he looked back at the horrified faces of the others, his voice breaking apart as he gasped for words. He looked back down at Jackie and pulled her as close as possible towards his body, trying to shield her, but the harm was already done. "Please don't leave me, baby..." he cried as he buried his face over her's, the sounds of the ambulance nearing the Foreman home. 


	6. Departure

Jackie opened her eyes slowly. She almost closed them back up when she saw the sight of her mother sitting before her. This had to be a dream.   
  
"What's going on?" Jackie managed to speak out, surprised at the staleness of her own voice. She winced at a sudden sharp pain in her arm. Looking down, she saw that her left wrist was bandaged up, and then the reality of what she had done came flooding back in her mind.   
  
"I don't know what to do with you, Jackie," her mom spoke out, a hint of sadness in her tone, as if she had been crying. Jackie turned her face away from her mother, only to see IV needles sticking out of her other arm. She closed her eyes instead, feeling uncomfortable looking anywhere.   
  
"I think I should go away for awhile mom," Jackie spoke in a mock-matured tone. She wanted it to sound like it was the best decision and the only way. She had failed at suicide, this was her back-up plan. She needed to get out of this life, away from the people who were trying to save her from herself, and away from the father of her baby. She wanted it all to end, and wanted out so badly that she had to take her life into her own hands. Since leaving this whole world for good didn't work any, she decided the next best thing was to vanish, to run from what she didn't want to face. She couldn't live here anymore. She would be watched constantly, she would be trapped in a marriage where her husband would end up hating her. She would end up like her mom, young with a child and running off at every chance she got just to get a break from her life. She had to end this now. She wasn't going to end up like that.  
  
Jackie's mom sat there, reaching out for her daughter's bandaged up arm, but Jackie scooted it away slightly, just out of reach. "Can you help me find a place? Until I have the baby? And then I'll come back..." she lied, having heard stories about girls being sent away when she was just a kid, girls who got themselves "into trouble" and came back home less than a year later, good as new, or so it seemed. But this was the 70's, abortion was legal, but Jackie knew she wouldn't be able to go through with it. She also knew she wouldn't be able to raise a child, not by herself and not with Steven. She wanted to be sent away like those girls, but unlike those girls, she never wanted to come back. She would let her mom know about that part later, though. She was still seventeen, and needed this to be believable if she was going to get away with it.  
  
Looking over at her mom, she pulled off her most pleading look, forcing herself to utter the next words, despite her feelings. "Please... mom..." She took in a deep breath. "Please help me, mom."  
  
Hearing that, Jackie's mom gave her a sad, but reassuring smile. She reached for her daughter's hand, but this time, Jackie let her touch it. She clutched her daughter's hand and stood up slowly. "Of course, baby," she whispered to her, with so much sincerity in her voice, it almost gave Jackie the chills. Her mom then came up to her and leaned over, kissing the top of Jackie's head, and not pulling away for a long time. Jackie almost felt the tears well up in her eyes, but she refused to cry. It took her near-death experience for her mother to finally start acting like a mother, and she wasn't going to stand for it. No matter how much she needed her, she wasn't going to trust her.  
  
TWO WEEKS LATER  
  
Hyde charged up to Jackie's mom in the waiting room. Him and Donna were finally allowed to go see Jackie after all this time, but when they got into her room, it was empty. Tapping her on the shoulder, Jackie's mom spun around to see Hyde's beaming red face in front of her, his glasses on top of his head, as he stared her down. "Where is she?" he demanded in a threatening tone. He knew that she was the one who had kept him and the others from seeing Jackie for all this time. He couldn't sleep for days straight, and spent most of his days unshaven and unbathed waiting in the visitors room of the hospital, pacing the floors and dwelling over everything in his mind. He couldn't take it any longer. He needed to see Jackie before he went insane. He had to see with his own eyes that she was alright, he had to make sure she was okay, he had to be with her. He wasn't going to lose her again, and this woman was not going to stand in his way.  
  
Jackie's mom shook her head. "Steven, it's too late. She left," she told him, as if she was reciting the news. She then attempted to turn her back on him again, but Hyde grabbed her arm more firmly this time, spinning her around to face him.   
  
"Where the hell is she Mrs. Burkheart? Don't make me-" he started to say, but stopped himself. Jackie's mom raised an eyebrow in amusement, almost letting out a ditsy laugh.   
  
"Steven, don't be ridiculous. Now please, don't start anything here. Jackie's safe where she's at, and everything will be okay, you just have to be patient," she told him in a poor excuse for an explanation.  
  
Hyde backed away from Jackie's mom, feeling the rage build up inside of him. Picking up one of the seats in the waiting room, he heaved it hard against the wall. Jackie's mom spun around in shock, as Donna backed away from Hyde. Hyde continued to lose it, kicking the table over, pushing over all the potted plants, destroying anything he could get his hands on. He just wished that he could have done all of this to Jackie's mom instead, pretending that every object in the room was her. Security soon charged into the room as one of the guys attempted to make a grab for him. Steven pulled back his fist and thrusted it hard into the man's face, the impact of the blow sending the guy flat on his back onto the floor. Hyde was about to pounce on him, reaching out his hands to grab for the man's neck, but two other guards ran inside and took a hold of Hyde, holding back his arms, as they had to drag him out of the room cursing and screaming. Tears began trailing down his face as they took Steven out into the hall, where a police officer was waiting to handcuff him.   
  
Hyde made one final attempt to get out of their grip, but nothing worked. Seeing Jackie's mom standing in the doorway, Hyde let out an agonizing cry, his knees giving out on him as he was lowered to the floor. "JACKIE!" 


	7. In the End

Red walked into the police station, and just as he pictured it, there was Steven sitting on the bench inside of a cell. He was slumped over and staring down at his hands, which were cupped together. And those damn sunglasses were on.  
  
"Hey, Dumbass," Red called out to get his attention, walking up to the bars as he narrowed his eyes in on Hyde. "You got lucky this time. I bailed you out," he told him. Actually, Red had felt sorry for Hyde, after all that had happened to Jackie, and now she was gone. Of course he couldn't tell Hyde this now, especially since he had landed himself in jail and was still on probation. Hyde had done something stupid and dangerous, and he had to learn that. He had to learn to stop being such a dumbass.  
  
Hyde got up from the bench without so much as raising his eyebrows. "Thanks Red," he muttered, almost inaudible to Red's ears. The guard then unlocked the cell door to let him out.  
  
ROCHESTER, MINNESOTA  
  
Jackie settled her bags down onto her new bunk, having to share a room with one other girl in the boarding house.  
  
"So, how far along are you?" the petite blonde beside her asked, having a giddy smile on her face as she touched her own stomach. "I'm only two months, can you tell yet?" she asked, obviously excited. Jackie couldn't understand why though, they were here for one reason only: to give up their babies.  
  
Jackie just shook her head no and didn't say anything else to the girl. She already found her to be slightly annoying, and didn't really wish to make friends here. Already, this place was suffocating her. She had passed so many miserable looking pregnant teens on her way up the steps. She couldn't believe there were so many here. None of them looked happy, they all looked like broken young girls, desperate for any kind of escape that was better than this place.  
  
"I have to go check on my laundry, I'll be back if you need help unpacking your things," the blonde said to her, and with a smile, she vanished out the door. Jackie turned her head in the direction that the girl went, frowning off at nothing as she stopped what she was doing. She looked down at her bags. This was it, this was her life. It was the only solution though, the only one left.  
  
Everything had rushed by so quickly, she needed time and she needed to be alone. Her life had come to an end as far as she was concerned. If she had the baby, she would probably end up miserable and alone, living off of welfare checks and struggling to make due. Her mom would hate her and worst of all, Steven would hate her. But if she gave up the baby, she wouldn't be happy either. She would always wonder where it was and if it was alright, if it was being taken care of... She would never be the same again.  
  
Tears started sliding down Jackie's cheeks as she slid down onto her bunk. She didn't know what she was going to do, but she had to go through with this. It was the best solution for her, her future, and this child's life. It was the best solution for everyone. There was nothing else she could do, it had to be this way.  
  
BACK IN WISCONSIN  
  
"Where's Steven?" Kitty asked in a worried tone, as she walked into Hyde's room, seeing Eric sitting on the corner of the bed.   
  
"He left," he told his mother glumly, his eyes dark and downcast as he spoke. He couldn't believe how messed up everything had become. Now Jackie was pregnant and off in some fancy boarding house and his best friend was gone. If Hyde even attempted to cross state lines, he would get himself into trouble somehow and end up getting caught. His probation would be in violation and he would end up in jail in a matter of no time. Eric looked down at his cupped hands and shook his head, worried about where Hyde was going to end up.  
  
Kitty took a seat beside her son on Steven's bed, putting an arm around him. "He's a grown man now, we can't watch after him like we used to," she tried to comfort him, but the words were only truthful, not comforting. The truth was, Eric was scared of where they would all wind up. Him and Donna, Jackie and the baby, Hyde's freedom, Kelso's new life... Everything was changing, and not for the best. It was far from being the best. In truth, he was scared to death of settling down for the rest of his life so soon. He was scared Jackie would wind up disappearing someday and that Kelso would run out on his family. And now he was concerned if Hyde would even make it to the age of twenty one. Before he had left here he was so set on destroying himself and everything in sight. He had that look in his eyes, like he was going to do something so drastic, which would either get him thrown in jail or possibly even get him killed. Now he was gone, without a word to anyone. Maybe he would find Jackie and they would live happily ever after together, but the odds of that were looking slim... Their lives had take a turn for the worse, and nothing would be the same again. 


End file.
